Pain gives me something to write about. If there were no pain in life, all my writing would be bland. Over the years, several of my characters have suffered from unexplained pain in the head or the face, and now my main character from Meet Me in the Garden has been correctly diagnosed with trigeminal neuralgia.
Today has been an exercise in patience and concentration. I’ve found it difficult to keep myself distracted from the throbbing, aching, and occasional stabbing in my face. It’s exhausting. Since ten o’ clock this morning, I’ve just wanted to go to bed.
But I know I can use all this somehow. That’s what people forget. There’s something good in everything, you just have to turn it around and look at it a different way.
Over the summer, when my pain was at the worst it’s been my entire life, I said to myself, “If this were my last week to live, where would I want to be? What would I want to be doing?” Having answered that question in my mind, I’m making the decisions that will put me where I want to be, where I need to be. Live life to its fullest now. I won’t over-think it, but it’s always possible there’s something going on inside my head the MRI didn’t catch. And if there is? Well, if something like that were discovered, I would want to know that I did my best to live my life now.
No pain, no gain– maybe that’s true. After all, I’ve learned a lot from pain, and every day it teaches me something new. Hug your cat / dog. Call your mom / dad. Tell your boyfriend / husband / girlfriend / wife how much you love them.
You never know when you might not get another chance.