But I went the wrong way when I crossed the finish line, and by the time I realized it, all the pies were gone. I came in 77 in my age group, and number 795 overall. Which isn’t bad considering there were almost two thousand people there. I ran between 10 and 12 minutes per mile, and it took me about 49 minutes. I’m amazed at how well I did, considering I haven’t been running regularly, and at four miles it was the longest race I’ve ever participated in. So far, I haven’t had any pain from my TN today, except for some irritation in my ears from the cold wind. I’m so grateful I was able to do it without hurting!
I have never gone to a race with a friend. I just go alone, though I have run into people I know at races. I love the feeling I get when I run past a crowd of onlookers, and they cheer. Growing up, I didn’t get much praise or positive reinforcement, so it’s amazing to hear all those cheers, and know that I’m a runner, I’m a part of the group the crowd is rooting for.
Someone called out, “Come on, Rosy!” as we neared the end of the last mile. I’m pretty sure it was a runner nearby who was talking to his dog, but I took that as a sign and sped up.
Lately I’ve noticed something. The other day, I was running down Indiantown in Jupiter, when it was almost as if I jumped out of my body. I felt like my consciousness had taken a leap and was leading the way, just a few steps ahead, tugging my body along like a puppet. It was the strangest feeling, and it’s hard to explain. Some might call it disassociation, I’m not sure. I’ve been practicing breathing when I run, breathing in when my right foot hits the ground, and breathing out when my left foot lands. Perhaps it’s something to do with the meditative qualities involved, but it’s as if I’m in a trance, not completely present. If I lose that, thoughts pop into my head and I begin to chide myself or worry, and that’s when I’m most inclined to take a walk break.
I think I’m beginning to master something I can’t quite put my finger on. I’m not sure if it’s meditation, but it’s quite similar. It feels like an out of body experience, but I’m moving while it’s happening. I was never any good at meditation, because I’m antsy and don’t like to sit still. There are some books on meditative running, and I own one that I haven’t finished reading yet.
I wish I knew a meditative runner so I could ask him or her, Does it ever feel like you’re having an out of body experience when you’re running?
Boy, I could really go for a slice of pie right now.
It’s okay, Rosa, it was apple. What you really wanted was pumpkin. Let it go.
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!